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04 April, 2012

To Bring or Not To Bring The Baby....That Is The Question

In a few short weeks I am going on my annual women's retreat. Last year I had just found out I was pregnant and my mind was very reoccupied with the little bean growing in my womb.  Ever since then I had always assumed I'd bring the baby with me on this year's retreat.  That's when I thought I would be breastfeeding her.

Well, since that didn't go as planned and I have been exclusively pumping it's time to reconsider if I bring the baby or not bring the baby.  I don't need to bring her, but I want to.

Here's my pros and cons list so far:

Bring the Baby


Everyone gets to meet her
I don't worry about her All.The.Time.
We can bond with all the other new moms with their little ones


Distracting to me
Exhausting to be away from home AND single parenting, even though dozen of women will be around to love on her.
Camp Sleep + Baby Sleep = No Sleep
I will need my own room, or a room with another mom, not necessarily with "my girls"

Not to Bring the Baby


I can really focus on the retreat
Get two nights of sleep.  Camp Sleep > Baby Sleep
Learn to let go
Room with my besties or wherever


I will feel like I am missing part of me
I won't get to show off my pride and joy
I will constantly be wondering how Eric is doing with her without me

Other information:

Regardless if I bring baby or not I will need to find a room with enough privacy to pump a few times a day.  Milk storage isn't an issue.

My mother-in-law has offered to help Eric with Evie and has already planned a few outings.

Eric said it's up to me, either way.  And that he is more than happy to stay home with Evie because I stayed home with her when he was on the Men's Retreat.

So ladies (and gents, if you've actually read this far!), what would YOU do?  What should I do?  Bring this cute face or leave her with her Daddy for the weekend?


  1. Leave her...and we can pump together..haha. Reason....bonding time with daddy is so awesome for Eric and evie. And you can really focus and be a better Mommy for the retreat when you get home! Letting go a little is sometimes very good thing.

  2. Leave her.  Any chance I get to leave my kids, I do it.  Not because I don't love them, but because since we are together all.the.time, it's so nice to have a chance to miss them.  And it's good for Eric to get a chance to take care of her.  I know when I'm around, I am always telling Adam what to do and how to do it.  The times he's been totally in charge (mostly when I've been in the hospital), it's amazing that everything is just fine without me.  He does things his own way and it's good for him to get a chance to do that without me hovering over him.  Plus, if you leave her, you get to miss her and then you'll be so happy to get back to her!! Some time away from the kids with girlfriends?  Totally totally leave her.  Can you tell I'm a little jealous of the thought of a few days without kids? Maybe I'll do my own retreat......

  3. My opinion as a mom of two now would be to leave her.  If I had one kid, I'd probably feel torn like you and not as decisive.  However, now that I can just comment on what YOU should do and not think of leaving my Elsa or Daniel... its easier!  If you can text your husband throughout the day, bring a slew of baby photos in some sort of brag book form to keep the friends happy and connected to Evie, AND you know you can actually pray and think and be calm, you should.  If you will want to drive home in the middle of the night/conference, that's a sign you should not go or should take her.

    And an idea you didn't consider - if you have more than one kid, losing nights' of sleep is a bigger deal than with one kid.   This might be a golden opportunity to do something with Evie and your friends and a special memory.  It won't be easier with a bigger family.

    Right now I am so starved for alone time that I'd probably go alone.
    I cannot even make cohesive blog comments I need so much alone time.

    So - that's  my idea.

  4. You're so right! One of our conversations last night was about me "smothering him" as a Dad.  I think this would be great practice in letting go.  Thank you for your words of wisdom!

  5. Thank you for your input! I keep challenging myself with "what if I have two kids?" It'd be a no brainer - GET OUT!!! haha.  I think I am going to use your suggestion of bring a photo or two of her to brag with :)  Great idea!

  6. How old is she?
    I take my babies with me,I would n't be able to relax and I want them with me.
    Do what feels best and have a lovely time.


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