29 November, 2012

For better, for worse

Though these are not the preferred version of the Catholic marriage vows, we are all familiar with the similar vows to these in the secular world,
Priest: (Name), do you take (name) for your lawful husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?

Bride:  I Do.
These last two or three weeks has been a trial against every aspect of our marriage vows.

For better, for worse...

I just came off my busy season for work. I was tired exhausted, cranky, and drained in every aspect.  I was running on empty.  This coupled with the everything else that happend this week (see below), I wanted to give up.  Not on my marriage, not on my daughter, but on myself.  I wanted to lock myself in my room for a month.  I cried in public. I cried at bible study.  I cried talking to my cube-mates.  Worn thin.

This morning Eric calmly said to me, "I know you're exhausted but I don't appreciate the attitude you've had with me the last few afternoons.  It makes me not want to help you."

As much as no one ever wants to hear that they're in the wrong, I am thankful that my husband takes our vows seriously enough to call me out on things like this.

For richer, for poorer...

We are abundantly blessed that Eric's company gave him warning this summer that his job had an end date.  He suspected this was coming and had already started networking.  He found a new job, though a bit of a pay cut and a much longer commute, quickly. They let him stay at his old job long enough to earn his bonus.

The new job started right as I was in last week of my busy season.  Transition on top of stress. Oy!

To make things fun (and more complicated) we were days away from closing on our first home.  Running budgets and numbers, credit checks, paying for all sorts of incidentals.  It's all the minutia that I am so thankful that Eric has a knack for.  If the financials were up to me...um...we'd probably be living in my parents attic. (Nerds and free spirits, unite!)



In sickness and in health...

As if things weren't complicated enough with a new job, new house and my work finishing up...we had a few health set backs:

  • I was diagnosed with adult torticollis which led to a series of issues with my neck and shoulder.  I have been in rehab and visiting a chiropractor 1-4 days a week for several months.
  • Eric has had an on going issue (I'll spare you the details) for two years, for which surgery was the last and final option.  The surgery was Wednesday the day after we closed on the house and the day before Thanksgiving.  He had some minor (if not being able to pee is minor) complications on Thanksgiving and ended up in the ER that night.  Thankfully we had agreed to stay at my parents house for a few days. This way they could take care of Evie while I was taking care of Eric.

  • While the house closing, moving, surgery and Thanksgiving extravaganza were taking place, Evie came down with a stomach bug which included 3 days of throwing up and spiked fevers at night followed by 3 days of, ahem, things flowing freely from her bottom. (I wanted to scream, EVERYONE KEEP YOUR BODILY FLUIDS TO YOURSELF)

While I might be at my breaking point with puke, lack of sleep, boxes and a husband on the mend, I can't help but be blessed and Thankful.


In a quick conversation with Monsignor today, he and I were laughing over my dramatic situation and I teared up telling him how thankful I am for my parents, family and friends, he pointed out that I should never take it for granted. How blessed we are to have people we can rely on to pick us up when we need it.  Amen to that!!

I am incredibly thankful for every load of puke covered (Evie) and blood covered (Eric) laundry that my parents did this weekend. For the meals they prepared and that friends have delivered.  

For the brothers that hauled truck loads of boxes.  For the movers who worked quickly, carefully, and cheerfully. 

For the house (I keep squealing with excitement!). For our jobs.  And for my faith in God who carried me through.

Sorry I don't have a more fun Thanksgiving update, something like last years...but even a new house doesn't top a newborn!

4 comments:

  1. I am kinda overwhelmed just reading...but wow... the hard part is over and you can look back and say...I AM AMAZING for getting through all of that!  Plus at times like these...we remember the importance of prayer, community and family and that makes it all worth it too!

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  2. I'm glad there are people in the world like you who take marriage seriously. Though I'm sure it was hard, I'm overwhelmed just reading, you made it through and can still be thankful. You are awesome just for that alone,though, I'm sure you have many other great things about you.

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  3. I'm glad there are people in the world like you who take marriage seriously. Though I'm sure it was hard, I'm overwhelmed just reading, you made it through and can still be thankful. You are awesome just for that alone,though, I'm sure you have many other great things about you.

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  4. Awh, E, I didn't realize just how much was going on with you!  I am glad to hear that things are starting to get better.  I LOVE that Eric called you out.  He gave you a few days and then was like "ok, we're done."  Love it!  I mean, you might or might not have loved it at the time and I have definitely been in that situation myself where Duncan had to be like "ok, I get you're going through something, but that doesn't mean x, y, and z."  Reality checks can be brutal.  Know you all are in my prayers! xoxo

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